Rib out.. again

(Being in a) Hard Zone demands a cooperative world for you to function.
A man wants to walk across the land, but the earth is covered with thorns. He has two options- one is to pave his road, to tame all of nature into compliance. The other is to make sandals. Making sandals is the internal solution. Like the Soft Zone, it does not base success on a submissive world. - Josh Waitzkin, “The Art Of Learning”



I have a rib out.

I was a little suspicious of that after Sunday night, when I felt that fist-sized "rock" knot under my right arm while I was lying on my bad side on the floor.

However, this is a wholly different experience than my previous "rib out" episodes. In all my previous experiences, the problem manifested in the front middle or lower ribs. This time it's manifesting in the BACK- and/or the side (again, it's really hard to pinpoint the origin once the nerve pain is radiating all over the place). Previously, it was a pretty mild ache except when I was actually moving/twisting the area (rolling over in bed, coughing, etc)- at which point it felt like being impaled by a (splintery and poisoned) javelin. I could hardly do anything productive in BJJ class for several weeks- even a small shrimping motion was agony.

By contrast, in this case, there are constant shooting, stabbing pains that feel like being electrocuted.... going from the right shoulder blade up the back of the skull (cue headaches) and down the right arm to the wrist (cue aching and numbness of arm). Certain movements seem to cue the pains to some degree, but they are present on such a constant basis just from BREATHING that I decided I didn't have much to lose by trying to go to class today.

I wasn't sure how this was going to work out- and I did just drills, a little positional sparring, but no live rolling. I was surprised and relieved to find that I wasn't in much more pain in class (this time, anyway) than I was reclining in bed or sitting at the computer- the difference being, in class there are interesting things happening to DISTRACT me from how much pain I'm in. So I guess I'll resume going to class.

Some of the muscles are doing that twitching thing again right now.... I can't help thinking that I can't really make things worse by getting stuff moving around.

Anyway, backtracking... last night I foam-rollered myself a little, and this morning (for the first time in a week) I actually felt like the pain had dialed down a notch or two. I had an appointment with the chiropractic neurologist late in the afternoon. I have my guard up, I'll be honest. They are very up-front about the fact that they want you to pretty much bring your sleeping bag and Mastercard and move in. For many conditions, they want you in there initially a few times a week (even up to every day) for up to twelve weeks. If you are feeling great and perfectly healthy, they STILL want you in there once a month. They don't even accept insurance. While I can certainly understand wanting to foist the hassle of dealing with the insurance company off on the patients, that can also be one way of hard-selling you more than your insurance is willing to pay. They also insist that if you are married, your spouse MUST accompany you to your initial consultations so that they will understand your condition enough to be financially supportive of your continued treatment. Yeah, they're totally setting you up- but they are very up-front and unsubtle about setting you up- which I have a certain respect for. I can deal with that... I just need to make sure I define and stick to my boundaries. The doc did not offer me any drugs- which I approve of. Honestly, at this point, I might have taken something just to blunt the pain enough to let me get to sleep (although I was prepared to decline Percoset)..... but this problem is not going to be fixed by drugs, and I am not the sort of person who wants or expects my health challenges to be fixed by drugs. Nor do I want my doctor to simply write me a scrip and shoo me out. I feel that too many doctors and patients buy into that scenario.

He took a bunch of x-rays, which I should be able to see tomorrow, and did a few minor adjustments. He stood me up against the wall and had me cross my arms over my chest, and then he pressed me into the wall. OMG. My back did not just crack- I swear to God, it sounded like he'd stomped on a jumbo bag of potato chips. There was a whole CACOPHONY of cracks. I groaned loudly, and he was like, "Was that okay?" Yeah, it didn't really hurt much, that sound just freaks me out. He cracked me a few more times in a few more positions, and I groaned each time. Ai-yi-yi. I hate letting someone crack my back. Not only does the sound make my hair stand on end, I can't get rid of the visualization of my spinal cord as a breathtaking fragile snowflake-structure- and the slightest jar in error is going to see me in a quadriplegic paralysis for the rest of my life. This visualization makes it really challenging for me to hold still and try to relax while some stranger is jerking my neck from one side to the other and making sounds like breaking broomsticks.

The shooting nerve-pains did not improve, but I know the muscles are all seized up in the affected area, and I wasn't really expecting the pains to magically vanish right away after one back-cracking. I am *NOT* going to move into the office... but I'll give the guy a fair open-minded shot at making me feel better (at least till my money runs out). We'll see how it goes.


So, as I said, I got out of there and decided to go to the evening BJJ class in Bellevue. I did indeed have a couple of people ask me where I'd been, which is always nice. I wore the dark chocolate gi. I like it a lot. I don't think Carlos does, though. He didn't exactly say as much, but I think I'm getting a little better at reading between his lines. It makes sense that he would be one of the Gracie white and blue purists. I should wear my cream gi to the next class, before I up and assault his sensibilities yet again with my forest green!! LOL.

I foam-rollered myself a bit more while waiting for class to start. I don't know if that's what made me feel marginally better this morning (by late afternoon, I was back to the previous levels of pain), but I figured it was worth a try.

There was a visiting female black belt there. Her name is either Mina or Mila.... I didn't quite catch. She is only 110lb! Hope she sticks around long enough for 1)me to get a chance to play with her some, and 2)to kick a whole bunch of big guys' asses and give them a healthy respect for a tiny woman with Skillz. Many of these white belt men have not met (or been steamrollered by) Cindy. I miss that part of Cindy being at Gracie Barra.

We drilled a couple of basic guard breaks. Carlos took the time to come over and walk both me and my partner (a white belt name Kelly, with really cool pink-tipped short hair) through the fine details.

A little king-of-the-hill positional sparring. I held down the black belt woman for a few minutes in top half guard, but then she swept me with pretty technique. Other people, I fought gamely for a few minutes and then was overcome. One thing of note: I need to pay more attention to how I am positioned with the eye that someone may goonsweep me at any moment- or make some other violent caveman motion- and thus put something of mine into an unpleasantly twisty situation. In this particular case, I was kneeling in Steve's guard and bracing against getting swept to the right- then he used strength to goonsweep me roughly to the left instead, which torqued my leg around in such a way that I was fortunate to escape a bad injury. He also slammed me to the mat on my back hard enough to almost knock the breath out of me. I waited for my injured back to flare in agony, but it was fine. I couldn't suppress a grunt with a ghost of a whimper, though. He apologized three times.

There were some unusually strenuous conditioning explosions both before and after class. Pushups are not fun with my rib out. Nor sprawls.





(pic) Here are the dyed gi's- the "dark chocolate" gi, and the "black forest" gi. To the immediate right of the forest gi are the ripstop material pants that came out more slate than green and aren't matching very well; to the far right is the spare pair of gi pants that match better (till a bit lighter than the jacket) but are a little smaller than I'd like.