Kirkland

…Their minds are always hyperactive, too caught up in the unstoppable flow of thoughts to pay any attention to the ecstasy dancing in front of their noses. They don’t know what it means to live in a body that doesn’t just serve as a machine carrying the mind from one place to another. -Daniele Bolelli, On The Warrior’s Path



134.0

In my week of experimentation with calorie counting, the sad fact has emerged that I have to stay below 1000 cals per day just to avoid gaining. If I want to lose, I have to be well under 1000 *and* go to at least one class.

Bring on the zombocalypse! I will be able to survive (and fight) on one kernel of corn per day.



Evening BJJ at KIRKLAND! First night of class. This pod is close to my place and I think the commute traffic on the streets between should not be awful. It's a nice space. 2 big, nicely remodeled bathrooms (1 with a shower), a roomy women's changing room, garage door at the far end of the mat
to open when it's hot, high ceilings.

The only thing I *don't* like about it is that it's right next door to the ferret rescue- which opens up the horrid possibility of running into SK at some point. Hopefully he is too busy to be volunteering. Hopefully he has moved very far away. Hopefully he has been abducted by aliens.

I sneaked up behind Will and choked him, leading into a warm-up roll.

Standup: Pummelling. Then: pummeling to ankle pick.

Then: One partner stands, the other lies on hir back. "Down" person sits up, scoots in and turns the corner to end hugging the leg and pressing back of shin with shoulder. Side to side.

Finally: Standup, one sleeve cuff grap and one lapel grip. Step on opponent's hip on the same side that you have the sleeve cuff grip. Drop onto back, swing free leg out wide, square up and place both feet on opponent's hips. Let go of lapel and grab behind foe's ankle. On CUFF GRIP side, take foot off hip and spider guard. Pretend you're going to push opponent over backward.... but suddenly jerk hir arm across your own body and pull the ankle to make hir face plant instead. Get up, KEEP ANKLE and push it ahead of you as you get up to avoid the closed guard.

Picture time- I declined to be in the photo, so they had me be the photographer.

Three rolls with that good blue belt guy from Edmonds- he dominated me utterly and tapped me three times.

Then I rested a bit and cuddled Pat's dog- who tried to french-kiss me as usual. You really need to keep your face well out of Mochi's reach. After he licked both of my arms from wrist to shoulder, he settled down and gave me his back. I called Pat's attention over, and pretended to RNC his dog.

A little rolling with Lindsey, who was on top most of the time, and tapped me with a keylock. Then they were shooing us out.
 

Bargaining

134.0




Kitsune:
It is very upsetting to learn that we will be evaluated and categorized based on BMI. BMI is a very simplistic tool which is inaccurate for many people.

I am an athlete who is almost certainly in the top 2% fitness level of those in the pool. Yet because BMI counts muscle as fat, I qualify as "overweight" according to this tool- which is deeply ironic.

I will be extremely displeased if I recieve letters or e-mails chiding me for being unhealthy based on my BMI. And if there are premium-cost or other sanctions, I will be filing a lawsuit.

Union Rep:
To put you somewhat at ease, the attempt here is to get at folks who need to manage their weight due to being overweight or obese.  We are negotiating exceptions to those with medical issues that prevent some weight management at the time it is measured (diabetes and other issues that may need medical management before weight loss can occur) and those who are exactly as you describe yourself where BMI is absolutely no indication of health.  We are contemplating ways to get exceptions to the processes that we have not agreed on as yet.
 If you would like more detail, or have any other questions, please contact any one of the Coalition team members:  (redacted) or myself, the UFCW Negotiator (my office number is below also).
 And thank you for letting us know your issue!

Kitsune:
Thank you so much for your response to my concern. This has been weighing (ha) on my mind, and I appreciate you taking the time to write.

It does indeed put me somewhat at ease to know that there is an awareness of the limitations of BMI, and that there will be avenues put in place to deal with people for whom this is not a valid measurement.

I'd be happy to submit to a body fat percentage analysis or other measurement of fitness that will not penalize me for being muscular. I realize that these other measurements are more expensive, though. Perhaps any doctor who sees us in-office at some point during the year (for anything) can sign a waiver after looking at our six-packs and verifying that we are not unhealthy.   :)

Union Rep:
That’s exactly what we had in mind – the six-pack waiver -  not a whole different test.  We bargain again on the 30th and now I know what we’ll call the “I’m healthy” waiver! 
Thanks for that!

What 100 calories looks like

The martial arts are one of the methods that can teach the body to reawaken the sleepy senses. Those smart enough not to put them back to sleep at the end of the training see their everyday life filling up with magic. -Daniele Bolelli, On The Warrior’s Path





134.5 (again).

Snyder's Of Hanover honey mustard pretzel pieces: 100 calories = 1/6 of a cup. Do you understand how small 1/6 of a cup is???!!??

I don't like counting calories- but I am a scientist, and my brain wants formulae. I want to see "You do A, you get B." Solid, predictable cause-and-effect. I understand that. I can work with it. I can't handle days like the one I had a few weeks ago where I ate very little, did 3 BJJ classes and found the following morning that I had actually *GAINED* a half pound. That sort of thing makes me feel like it's not even worth trying.

Plus, I'd like to know how many calories I really have to stay under in order to lose weight- and have some factual vindication that I am some kind of freak whose body gains weight just by breathing oxygen. Not that that will help my situation, but at least I can play the martyr with more heartfelt bitterness.

-------------------
Sunday lunchtime in Seattle with (newly brown-belted) Coach Peter. He is quite unhappy at being promoted, BTW. Hee hee... Jiu jitsu artists are always so hot to get their blue belts, and after that they hate and fear each successive promotion more and more. I find it amusing.

There were only 5 of us today, all big men except for Angus (who is medium-sized); a brown belt, two purples, and two almost-purples.

 King Of the Hill from various positions. No real surprises for me here. A few things, I am very good at (passing top half guard); more things I consistantly suck at (holding back mount).

 I felt that I did a decent job staying fairly competitive today, considering the sizes and skill levels I was facing.

That's not very much.

Those who have never approached their bodies as temples have no idea of what they are missing. The frog at the bottom of the well sees only a fraction of light and believes it to be the whole sky. The same happens to those who have lost the address of their bodies.
-Daniele Bolelli, On The Warrior’s Path



134.5 and holding...


Housemate, upon viewing my breakfast: Oh, so that's your......uh, "food".... I guess....

Kitsune: Grumblegrumblegrumble

Housemate: Wow, that's not very much.

Kitsune: Grumblegrumblesnarl



Saturday at GB Seattle.  I got to see many people that I don't regularly see... Black belt Lindsey, John (whom I was able to congratulate for his promotion), Cornelia. Also, a bunch of the Bothell crew was there. There are many hardworking newbies at the now-defunct Bothell pod that I was worried about losing in the move, so I was happy to see this batch.

Same technique we did on Wednesday, only this time the attacker went to front mount and left enough room to entice the victim to try to turn out and escape- at which point back-taking happened.

I worked with Crisanne, who busted her buns (even more so with encouragement and urging). She is so small that I was able to make her catch air as I was hurling her to the mat... I kept asking "Am I hurting you? Let me know if I'm going too hard." I also advised her to not let me push her flat on her back- to try to keep her ribcage turned a bit toward me in order to protect her ribs. I learned that the hard way on Wednesday when I was grunting and gasping under Ron's side control.

Standup: foe grabs your lapel. You grap hir wrist with both hands, thumbs down. Step in and elbow to the face (if self-defense scenario), rake elbow down torso, step behind hir near foot and wrap near arm around hir waist while continuing to control the wrist with your other hand. Your head/shoulder should be against hir body so that you can use it to trip hir backward over your foot.

One roll with Cornelia, one with (blue belt) Lindsey.... Hmm, I think I did one more, but I can't remember with whom.

Peter was promoted to brown belt!

I haven't seen Kelly this week, and I'm worried- she had sworn up and down that I didn't injure her elbow seriously, so I hope that was the truth.

Study Hall- spider guard

The energy is always there within reach. It is a fire that doesn’t always burn in the open, but under the skin the coals are always lit. Anyone sensitive enough can feel the vibration. As soon as you enter a room, right away you perceive who is an individual from head to toe and who has never listened to the voice of the body. -Daniele Bolelli, On The Warrior’s Path



Thursday and Friday: walk to work and back.


Friday evening "Study Hall" at Bellevue with Doug. It was "purple belt nite"!

Fun with spider guard.

Begin in closed guard, transition to spider guard. Work a little from side to side... one leg straight, one bent...fluid hip movement. John advises that I try to get my butt a little closer to opponent.

Let left leg slide past bicep and yank opponent's arm diagonally across your chest. Swing hips out so that your right ear is toward your opponent. Drop that outside leg to the floor and bring it back against opponent's leg as you lift to the ceiling with the other foot (still in spider guard position). Sweep. Take KOB (I actually preferred to front mount instead, as it seemed that attempting KOB was opening myself up to the half guard).

Closed guard to Spider guard again. Side to Side. Now drop right shin horizontally across opponent's chest. S/he will try to pass. Underhook hir lead leg and use it- along with your remaining spider guard side- to sweep.

Two 10 minute rolls with Daniel and one with Doug. Daniel wants armbars. I'm good at jerking my stubby arms out of those, but he got close a few times... then I started being more careful. Doug kept putting me in back mount, but he was being nice and letting me escape (although he did not make it easy by any means).

GB Bellevue has a grill sitting out front. They were already starting steaks during the open mat. I had to leave, as I am dieting.

I have survived all week on portion sizes that would not nourish an infant fieldmouse. I am down from 139 (at PSG) to 134.5 (this morning).

I have decided to cut down to 128 (still in the "overweight" category by the Bullshit Mass Index standards) and then take a bikini pic. I will hold a paper over my face that says "This is what an "overweight" BMI looks like". I will use this as a visual aid if I have to file a grievance with my workplace. I might get a body fat percentage done too, just for shits and giggles, as I'm sure that will be crazy low and will make the BMI Patrol look even more retarded.

Always double-check the "to" line

Kitsune (at work, e-mailing note to self):

“Victims who survived a violent confrontation against a knife-wielding assailant consistently reported that they were completely unaware of the existence of the weapon until after they had suffered stab or slash wounds. In essence, these survivors of edged weapon attacks state that they believed they were engaged in some sort of fist fight; only later, after sustaining injuries, did they realize that the assailant was armed.” - Lawrence Kane
----------------------------------------------------------
Kitsune (Realizing half a second after hitting “send” that autocomplete sent the frickin' thing not to her home e-mail addy but to some random address owned by some random woman at my workplace with the last name of “Fox”):

!!!!!!SHIT!!!!!!!!
------------------------------------------------------------
Kitsune (to random hospital staff member):

OOPS!!!!!  Sorry about that,  I accidentally sent a self-defense class quotation to the wrong addy. Apologies. (blush)
-----------------------------------------------------------
Random staff member:

Haha I just read it was wondering HUH!!!
Have a great day  :)
---------------------------------------------------------------
Kitsune:

I figured I’d better explain that one real quick unless I wanted to find myself in Human Resources, explaining it to a security guard.
-----------------------------------
Random staff member:

At least we had a good laugh ;)
---------------------------------------------------------
"Pink Team" at Bellevue. Only Cindy, Lindsey and I showed up- so we just spent the whole hour rolling, round-robin.

Then "All levels".

Opponent is turtles, you sprawl N/S and then spin to side. Place you hip against hir hip. (This was where I messed up... in fact early on, Prof Carlos came over and told me to freeze, then he crawled *between* me and my drill partner.

Kitsune: "I guess I'm leaving a little too much space there."
Carlos: "Ten pushups. Purple belt......"

Okay, so you're hip to hip. now reach under hir chest with both arms and grab hir far arm. You have to get your near shoulder right UNDER hir, which was another awkwardness for me. S/he posts the leg out on the other side to keep you from shoving hir over. You swing your foot out in front of hir head, then swing it back hard and PULL opponent's upper body with you. Get in side control, staying heavy, but keep both of hir arms trapped under your arm. Turn slightly toward hir feet, pull on hir pants, front mount. Pull up on opponent's head and slide your body around behind hir shoulders. Secure back mount. Make sure both hooks are in.

Was drilling with Ron, and this seems like a good one for tiny, flexible people. He was very smooth, and since you usually get hauled up on your shoulder a titch when they mount, it can be hard to tell that that little compact body is sneaking in there.

Drills to nearly collapse, then we finished with an obscene amount of cardio.

As we lined up to bow out, I told the guys that I didn't think I had enough energy to life my forearm for handshakes. So they all started twitching a shouder up and forward to throw an arm up in the air.

I told everybody that I was thinking about competing again... maybe the sub-only comp next month, but more likely the Revolution in November. If I tell everybody, they'll keep on me and I'll be less likely to flake out.    :-P    ;)
----------------------------------
Ugh! My workplace's health insurance is now evaluating and categorizing people (with a goal of establishing sanctions) based on their BMI. I have a huge problem with this, since BMI is an inaccurate measurment for athletes (it counts muscle as fat). Although I'm probably in the top 2% of fitness for people in that employee pool, going by BMI alone will pigeonhole me as "overweight" and rank me below fat couch potatoes.

I'm going to try to appeal. If that doesn't work, I'm going to simply lie on my forms.

Triangles with Doug

A religion that forgives me for being a shit doesn't have near the impact of one that promises that whatever I send out is coming right back at me. -Anihow



Now that I'm not going to Bothell on my free Friday evenings, I have discovered that Prof Doug is doing a "study hall" at Bellevue in that time slot. We had a great group of mostly colored belts in there tonight, and worked on triangle setups.

First, some drills from guard, sans hands (Doug made us lace our fingers behind our necks).

Then: Start with foe in your closed guard, two cuff grips. Transition to a double knee shield or to butterfly guard (feet on hips). Act like you're going for spider guard on one side, and "miss"... transition to triangle. Yank the hell out of that cuff to help fuel your angle change, and try to get said angle change down to as few steps (and as quick) as possible.

Now: You are in top side mount. Make sure you have kneed the opponent's near arm atop your thigh. Slide your knee onto belly. when s/he pushes at knee with hir other hand, you grab the wrist/cuff and pin that hand. Yank your leg back, straight out, then hoist it up and over, shove your foot behind opponent's head. At the same time, with your free hand, haul hir head up (my partners and I discovered for ourselves that that was a lucious detail- very distracting to the victim). Roll. As you roll, grab opponent's other sleeve and lock the triangle as you finish the roll.

This intimidated me, as it looked complicated and showboaty. But when I tried it, it was nice and smooth.

Finally: You have opponent in armbar with your knees over hir face, but s/he is clasping hir hands together. Act like you're going to try to pry hir hands loose with your foot, but then shove the foot right through. Open your knee above opponent's forehead. This prompts hir to sit up. Let hir. This results in putting hirself right into your triangle. (Another tidbit we discovered during the drill... this bait doesn't work nearly so well unless you really act like you are going for the armbar, and keep your leg over the opponent's face. That way, as soon as you lift that leg and s/he sees daylight, s/he wants to lunge up into it. At first, my partner was not covering my face- and I had to think about where I was "supposed" to go for the drill.)

A roll with (blue belt) Daniel, a roll with Mario, a roll with Doug. Good competitive matches all (of course Doug was letting me work a little).

Nice gi choke from Doug: You are in top side control. Sneakily get ahold of your own gi tail (on the side closest to opponent's feet) and wait your chance to shoot it to the far side of hir neck. You must leave yourself plenty of slack, because you are going to feed this gi tail to your other hand, which is behind opponent's neck.  Grab opponent's pants at hir hip (same side as you are on), turn N/S, put your forehead to mat.

I adore gi tail chokes, but for some reason my brain is very impaired at retaining them.