"No matter how fast you do eet, you still have to stay here for an hour."

Peyton Quinn’s rules of conflict:
Don’t ignore him.
Don’t insult him.
Don’t challenge him or accept his challenge.
Leave him a face-saving exit.


Thursday lunchtime BJJ in Bellevue.

Being the last kid picked for the kickball team today landed me a black belt drilling partner (Sean). I managed to fall/roll over his hand and also clock him in the forehead within the first five minutes. Sometimes I think I should be wearing a clown suit on the mat.

Carlos had the heat cranked up to "Brazilian Beach In July" again today. We did a long sequence, adding a new piece every 10 min or so, but always starting with the double-leg from standing.

Double leg from standing. I continue to suck at wrestling takedowns. I know I'm not getting close enough to the opponent during the setup- and also, going down (and- especially-getting up again) is difficult on my bad knees. Sean wants me to change levels as a distinct step BEFORE sticking my lead foot between his feet. As I am doing the double-leg, I can't help thinking, "Good lord, his thighs are like cement pillars." I hope I have cement pillars someday.

Failed double-leg to circling to the back and bear hugging. You lift opponent's feet off the mat, s/he wraps one shin around your shin to prevent being picked all the way up and dumped sideways.

You have no choice but to put opponent down. S/he reaches between hir own feet and grabs your ankle, pull to take down. (Note- when you are being taken down in this fashion, do not attempt to keep the bear hug. All that will get you is the opponent thudding down on your ribs like a cement mixer.)

Opponent steps out and pivots (with bent knee, not a big straight-leg spin that will expose the leg to grabbing) and goes to KOB, then front mount. After waiting 3 secons in each position to get points, s/he sinks one cross collar grip.

I had learned long since that one does not want to push the choking hand across one's own throat- thus telling your opponent, "No, buddy, don't bother to choke me- let me choke myself! No problem!" So when Carlos told us to put one hand on the wrist and one on the elbow, I thought I knew what I was doing. But he wanted us to do something that felt counter-intuitive.... PULL the wrist cuff away from the choke. This necessitated switching hands for me. I still have enough Tiger mentality that the world is all about PUSH to me... it rarely occurs to me to pull. I had to pause at this step the first few times and think it over.

Upa. After that bobble, I was so eager to move on that I explosively upa'ed the crap out of Sean, and the next thing I saw was Carlos' face.

"Why you breedge that way?"

"Uh, that would be stupid because he can post with that hand."

"Then why you breedge that way?"

"Because I was in too much of a hurry and didn't think."

"No matter how fast you do eet, you still have to stay here for an hour."   Which actually was kind a revelation, which I will try to keep in the forefront of my mind.

After upa, guard pass. A few different variations of leg spaghetti, involving trapping the opponent's arm across hir own body and keeping both  hir legs stretched out. I felt really off balance during the pass- like it would be easy to tip me onto my back- but Sean explained (and I saw for myself when he took his turn) that the opponent had no leverage for even the tiny push it would have taken to tip me over.

A little King Of the Hill, starting from side control. Top person try to sub, bottom person escape, catch guard or half guard. Camille got a legit sub on me. Awesome. She did a couple of abrupt switches on me- when we were straining in one direction, she suddenly switched to something else in the opposite direction and caused me to use my own force against myself. I love that, and still struggle to work it into my own game. Both white belt girls are giving great Shoulder Of Justice. They will need that, as tiny as they are.

A roll with a white belt who was delighted for me to school him in a Bunch Of Things That I Wish Someone Had Told Me When I Was a White Belt.  I told him that the best way to thank me would be for him to do these things to me next time we rolled. I love it when somebody kicks my ass with something I taught them.

Is my B.O. that bad?

Most of the time, the person who “wins” at violence is the one who crossed the line. –Campfire Tales From Hell

Open mat at Seattle.

I got there kind of late because I slept in a bit..... I never get to sleep in, and it was just so nice.... but I got to Seattle and as I walked in, everbody was clearing out.

Me: "Is my B.O. *that* bad??"
Peter: "It's pretty bad."

He stayed to roll with me for about 10 min, then he had to leave and the only person left was a young-20's blue belt that I'd never met before. He was fun. We rolled for an hour.

Now that it's getting cold, it is tempting to wuss out on hiking.... but the dogs are still eager to go, and one of my nearby walking buddies is being really helpful about getting us out there.

Look, spaghetti arms!

 


There are times when the body needs to heal, but those are ripe opportunities to deepen the mental, technical, internal side of my game.  You should always come off an injury better than when you went down.   -Josh Waitzkin, The Art Of Learning

Thursday lunchtime BJJ in Bellevue.  All spars. Justin, Nelson, John, Justin again. All good, competitive spars. Was noticing where my acrobalance/dance/contact improv experience crosses over. In those arts, you often work with a partner(s) to achieve a certain movement- but just as Johnny taught Baby, you have to lock your frame. Otherwise, your partner's movement does not move YOU where you are supposed to go. I was noticing my opponents today trying to move me in ways that required some degree of cooperation from me- mostly being tense enough (frame locked) to be levered this way or that. When I made myself limp and heavy at the moment that they tried to lever, the movement did not work (and I stayed on top).

The ego- a challenge that is constantly revisited.

“Great dancers are not great because of their technique,
they are great because of their passion.”
- Martha Graham


Friday evening BJJ in Bellevue.

I need to quit being so lazy about blogging my classes the same day- if I wait, I really have problems transcribing the techniques, and I can only assume that's going to translate to further problems retaining them.

I remember that I warmed up rolling with Peter. He is getting quite technical, but still using a lot of muscle. I guess I have not worked with anyone in a good while who muscles that much. I had thought I had grown out of the whole dick-waving thing where I try (vainly, of course) to muscularly match muscley men who are much more massive than me.  Found out that I am not. I kind of hurt myself straining against him, and I also hurt myself by being too stubborn to tap. I certainly EXHAUSTED myself. Time to revisit that important lesson.

We did some guard pulling from standing, and a sweep, and some triangle stuff, and Carlos pointed out that we do not need to have our bodies torqued way over to the side to do the triangle. We can just alter the angle of  the leg. And of course, it is critical to remember that pushing your leg down/forward is a lot more effective than trying to basically squeeze your thighs together in a nutcracker motion.

Teepee. Chrisanne was delighted with this, as it seemed to solve some of her short-leg issues in finishing the triangle. While I was happy for her, three reps of this gave me an immediate splitting headache.

I was taking my headache toward the locker room when Cindy walked in. For once in my life, my reaction to seeing Cindy walk in was "shit!"...... because I knew that she was competing the next day, and I had also mentioned the Friday evening Bellevue classes to her the day before- so I couldn't just  flee without letting her beat on me some. She wanted to drill a horrible takedown- a twisty arm drag that wrenches the elbow, shoulder, *and* back; and while you are writhing in pain, you get your foot hooked and hoisted above your head to get dumped hard. The first eight or ten weren't too bad, but after that, I wanted to cry. It would have hurt any time, but after my lengthy muscle-roll with Peter and my pounding headache, it was agony. Had to really grit my teeth to stop myself from saying, "I'm sorry, I just can't do any more of this tonight" (probably with a sob on the final syllable). After drilling, I was able to roll a bit with her, then begged off and gave her Ron instead. I always feel bad/ashamed that I just don't have what it takes to be a good uke for Cindy, especially when she is in comp mode..... I always try, but end up feeling really inadequate.

I've got all the answers. Well, THIS one, anyway.

”We either make ourselves miserable,
or we make ourselves strong.
The amount of work is the same.”
- Carlos Castaneda


Thursday lunchtime BJJ in Bellevue.

Man, I wish I could get to class more often. I was so happy to be in class. Carlos even remarked on the fact that I was laughing a lot today.

We did a bunch of spider guard sweeps that had about 862 steps with 5 critical little details in each step, and I have just tried and failed to transcribe any of them... although with Camille's help, I did okay performing them. She is better than I am at regurgitating long sequences of choreography, which is a persistent struggle for me.

I had one delicious moment of triumph today. Carlos demo'ed to the middle of one of these sequences, and said, "Now what if your opponent does THEES right now?" The front half of the line shouted several suggestions, all of which Carlos tried and demonstrated the wrongness of.  Then he told us to experiment with our partners and see if we could figure out something that would work. I immediately hipped out and transitioned to an armbar- AND I WAS RIGHT(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) I was the only one who figured it out!!!!!!!!! To be fair, this was partly because we had been doing sweeps all day and everyone else was searching for a way to salvage the failed sweep. Whereas I- either because I still retain a ridiculous amount of always-attacking Tiger attitude, or just because my sweeps suck- went for a sub instead.

Related and funny: at one point, the prof noted that during the sequence of one of these sweeps, we must pause and remove our opponent's arm from the place where it naturally ends up, because if we fail to do so, it turns into a bicep slicer and we will get DQ'ed. He demo'ed the bicep slicer, and obviously noted my eyes lighting up (as they do whenever a choice bit of "bonus violence" presents itself).  He looked at me sternly and said, "Keetsune. You do thees in competition?" "No sir."

One spar with Camille, one with the tattooed purple belt whose name I can never remember, one with Jason. All fun rolls. Tattoed purple belt keeps pulling guard on me, and I tried to tell him that I'd like to work standup and that it's okay for him to take me down, as long as he doesn't slam me. He's one of those people who insists on being a little *too* careful with me.

Had to skip the structured dog walk tonight.... even January would have been disenchanted with the freezing rain. We have been hearing all week about this monster storm that's supposed to be coming in, and apparently the world is supposed to end and everything, but it has yet to materialize (except for some freezing rain). Rilla and I took dogs out in the rain yesterday (on her urging... we decided even 20 min was better than nothing.... if it had just been me I would have bailed, which is why I want walking partners to push me... I thanked her), and the sun ended up coming out and we walked for 2 hours. Particularly glad to get that in, in case we are stuck inside for the next week.

This commute is killing my training.....

You may think you have an ace up your sleeve. Hell, you might even have one. But recognize that the other guy has three or four. If he didn’t think he had something that would let him win, he wouldn’t play. –Campfire Tales From Hell


I have done four classes since my last blog post. Still struggling a lot with insomnia and the resultant generalized "feeling like crap" as well as the issue of not feeling safe- or just plain not feeling like- driving to the school and back. Also feeling lazy about blogging.  :P  All I want to do is sleep, and since I can't sleep, all I feel like doing is nesting with a pile of books. I really want to go to jiu jitsu- I miss it, I crave it- but I'm struggling.

Anyway, I remember working on clock chokes; I remember working with three white belt guys over two days who were all respectful enough that I felt comfortable giving pointers. One of them in particular thanked me several times. It always feels so good. I really enjoy helping newbies, when I feel like they are actually listening to me- and I think I'm good at it.

I remember rolling with the visiting prof, whom I am pretty sure had me pegged as the village idiot because I kept asking him to show each technique One More Time. He started looking me right in the eye while he taught the class, and helped me more than anyone else in the room. That's great, although it did make me want to show him- when we finally rolled- that I actually do know a thing or two. I think I surprised him a bit.   :)

Worked with Chrisanne last night, which was wonderful. Hip throws, hip throw to armbar, armbars from mount. I am getting better at remembering to pinch my knees together, which has ever been the detail I tend to neglect.  Chrisanne and I did two spars (from standing) at the end... they were great spars. We are so evenly matched.

It's been raining for a week and a half, so walks with the dogs have also been curtailed- surely a
contributor to my general laziness. Finally got a 3 hour hike on Weds and an hour each Thurs and Fri. Was a bit sore after the 3 hour, but felt much better overall. Dogs get woefully stiff- and January gets very restless- when they are not getting hikes, so it's great incentive... although I can't do anything about the weather.

The Halloween candy situation at work was reather devastating. And now we are swinging into The Holidays. It would be good to try to keep my eating under some semblance of control.

Thursday: break-in, Friday: pit bull attack. How was your week?

Many people receive the answer to their prayers, but ignore them- or deny them, because the answers didn’t come in the expected form.  –Sophy Burnham



Thursday lunchtime gi in Bellevue. We got Rodrigo today! Carlos and Doug both had surgery at the beginning of the week, so they will be on the bench a while.

Opponent in turtle, you sprawled on hir left hip. Grab hir left sleeve cuff and right lapel. Move to the side and pull hir onto her side, switching to a "sash" grip. Stay heavy and keep public bone to the mat. As s/he places hir top foot on the mat to try to recover turtle, you stick your bottom leg into the space that s/he has just made between the mat and hir hip, and wrap hir bottom leg. Pull hir back into you, and place the second hook. Do not forget to trap the arm. (Note: do not- as I wanted to do- try to jump/climb on top of hir to get the back mount. PULL hir into you.)

Same entry, only now as you pull the foe onto hir side, you use your lapel grip to open the lapel and slide your other hand in. I always want to snug everything REALLY REALLY TIGHT, and Rodrigo instructed me to loosen up and slide down a bit on this lapel grip- because you want the person to try to recover turtle instead of realizing that they're about to get choked. As they go into turtle, you clock choke. Do not straighten your arm and pull at this. Keep the elbow bent and lean your chest over the opponent's head. Rodrigo puts his forehead on the mat.

My stupid side, which I only tried a few times at the very end and only because we had done about a bajillion reps, was much tighter because that side had me doing the clock choke with my dominant arm.

A little positional training from the point where you pull the opponent onto hir side and try to keep hir down, while opponent gives some (but not crazy) resistance.
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So some crazy and/or drugged homeless guy broke into my garage this morning. It scared the poop out of me, but I was very happy that I had a gun, so that I knew I could defend myself if he tried to get into the house. I was even happier to see the sheriff pull in. I could have set off the audible alarm and probably scared him off, but I wanted the cops to get him, so that I wouldn't have to worry about him coming back (for a little while, at least). He broke a window in my rear garage door, but luckily did not damage my car. The nice deputies caught him red-handed in there, carted him off in cuffs, and booked him for Burglary in the second degree.

I think the only thing I could have done better was to be more proactive about checking out odd noises. I heard some thumping, but assumed it was the cat messing around upstairs. It was only when the thumping continued that I went up to check, and found her asleep. I figured then that I had a bear in my garbage can. But when I looked out the window, I saw an unfamilar dude lurching up my driveway while holding an animated conversation with himself. Next time I will check out weird noises more promptly. If he had gone to the front door instead of the garage after rifling the garbage, things could have turned out much worse than they did.
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So, the day after some crazy homeless guy broke into my garage, my dogs and I got attacked by a loose pit bull. It tore up Teal pretty badly. I was well weaponed up, yet could not adequately defend.

Because I am so paranoid, my head is always on a swivel and thus I glanced behind me and saw the pit come out of the driveway. As soon as I laid eyes on that dog, I knew we were going to get attacked. I yelled "NO!" powerfully, as that has been recommended by some dog-savvy friends. I was then able to get off a couple yells for help and get my pepper spray out of my pocket before it was on us.

The dog attacked Teal, and I emptied half the can of pepper spray right into its eyes to no effect at all. I could not shoot it because we were in the middle of a populated subdivision. My knives would have been a poor weapon- this dog was not responding to pain compliance techniques, and I would have had to get under its throat and get a few really good deep slashes to put it out of commission. At that point, my bag of tricks was empty.

All I could do was yell for help. I tried to pull the pit off my dog, but it just kept hold and I was dragging both dogs. I really needed a second person- one to grab each dog and pull them apart. But although ten or twelve people came out to see what all the screaming was about, no one helped.   :(    Now I know what Kitty Genovese felt like.

Eventually the dog owner's dad came out, and stood there to stare for a moment before wading in. He grabbed the pit's harness and gave it a couple of ineffectual tugs, then he started whipping the dog over the back with a little nylon strap. Of course that didn't do jack. Finally I gathered my wits enough to yell at him, "grab the harness and pull him off! Grab the harness and pull him off!" Which he finally did.  As I fled for our lives, the guy was lying in the middle of the street bear-hugging the dog.

So, several lessons learned.

1)Don't expect help. Even if there are lot of people around. They will just stare, or maybe take out their iphones to video your attack. You are on your own.

2)Please don't be that person. If someone is yelling for help, fucking HELP.

3)I thought I was well weaponed-up, but two of my weapons were inappropriate for the situation and the third one failed me. I have thought a lot about what would have helped in that situation, and I decided that a hammer would have gotten the job done. I went to Lowe's and bought a really nice heavy mallet with a comfy grip and good balance. I am now carrying that whenever I walk the dogs. The next loose dog that puts its teeth in my dog is going to get its fucking skull bashed in.

4)It was astonishing to what extent my brain switched off in the presence of that much adrenaline. I had to leave the scene, because Teal needed to go to the ER, and that guy still did not have his dog under control, so we fled. Later I had a hard time finding the attack site, I wouldn't have been able to pick that guy out of a lineup, and I was even unsure what color the dog was- which is funny seeing as how I was wrestling with it for three minutes. Your brain really shuts down all the extraneous details. Next time, remind self to stop and take note of details, especially if you have to flee the scene.

5)Even if you have decided that your pepper spray is useless, don't put the can back into your pocket. Just the small amount of dried liquid left on the outside of the can ate right through my pants and gave me a miserable chemical burn. My entire thigh looks like it's been roasted over a slow fire. (Again- how did that monster dog just ignore this? I knew it wasn't going to respond to pain compliance techniques, but I was hoping that the pepper spray directly into the eyes would blind it and make it difficult to breathe. Nope.)

6)January is tactically useless. All he did was run circles around us in scared confusion. I always hoped my dog(s) would try to do something if I was screaming for help, but it did not trigger him. Note: do not expect his help in the instance of a break-in.


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I went to BJJ class on Friday night, but I had too much going on to blog it, and now I can't remember what we did. I also missed ALL classes the following week.
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Thursday lunchtime BJJ in Bellevue.  I got to drill with Nelson, which is always wonderful.

Triangles from guard.

From guard: fake a scissor sweep, then hook your toe under the thigh instead. Sweep hir AWAY from you. Note that you have to be really close to make this work- if you shrimped out too much getting set up for the scissor, it's really hard to lift the guy using just leg strength.

Same basic thing from standup.

My favorite choke: the one where you get a deep cross grip and then grab a handful of gi at the back of the shoulder to finish.  We turned our bodies to use the thigh to force the opponent's head down as if we were going to armbar, then swung back to finish the choke straight on. Weirdly, it's a chicken-wing pulling motion- yes, the very thing we are always told NOT to do. But it was beautiful. I found, while being the uke, that when the opponent swings that leg up, it makes you think he's going for a triangle or armbar, so you want to yank back- which will just make you choke yourself even harder.

Three spars with three white belt ladies. They are all game and trying hard. Gave them all some (I hope useful) pointers.